In the modern age electronic socialization has taken a serious role in the day to day interactions of everyone. I respect that everyone has their unique reasons for being on line and are trying to portray something unique to them or their community. That having been said we have identified some major mistakes across the board. If you find yourself doing these actions, please stop and examine your reasons carefully and with love. None of the actions listed will be productive in the long term.

Stalk Your Ex’s

Whatever the reasons for your break up, sit down and remember them. Not just the good or the bad times. Think bask to how you felt right before and right after the separation. There is a good reason, or reasons, the two of you are separated. Don’t let your curiosity or desire justify stalking them. These are unnecessary and unproductive attachments that are ultimately self defeating and unproductive.

The nurturing of these emotions will stunt your current growth, split your mental and emotional energies, and make it all the harder to move on. You can’t properly love a person while another holds your heart. If you realize a mistake has been made then reach out an correct it. If you need ‘closure’ examine why. I find that the search for ‘closure is a justification technique to pick a fight or an excuse to not move on.

Create The Ideal You

The way we communicate through technology goes through a heavy mental screening before it hits the web. The urge to paint ourselves as the ‘end product’ or the ‘ideal’ you is tempting. Realize though that your are not only disrespecting yourself and your goals but limiting the kind of relationships you’ll draw to you.

You are respecting yourself when you can’t be honest with who you are. When you do this you aren’t acknowledging your struggles and your strengths. By lying about your ‘weaknesses’ you are changing the range of your character, not allowing people to see this makes you seem two dimensional.

The people who are interested in meeting the fake you, will be forced to build fake connections as they probe a false persona. The point of friendship and love is to not only enjoy one another but help each other grow. If you never show the real you then ‘YOU’ will never grow. Only your persona will grow and it WILL eventually crumble.

Constantly Respond Negatively Or Frequently Make Fun

No one likes that negative jerk in the corner in real life, the same is true for the digital realm. The only difference is you’ll get feed back in the real world and none digitally. You won’t be able to see the reactions of the people you are mean to or ‘joke with’. If it’s home they will put down their device and react in real time. Even if they do respond, you aren’t likely to take it the right way as you would in person.

Cyber bullying and its sub groups are vicious and unnecessary. You don’t know what something may mean to a person. Use the golden rule in these situations, ‘If you have nothing nice to say, SHUT UP’. In a similar vein, there is a productive way to tell people the truth or provide criticisms. NEVER use the ‘truth’ as a weapon.

Compare Yourself

Back to the topic of creating the ideal you, people are usually looking for justification in their character and attention to their lives. Never mind how valid these elements are when online. This person is trying to feel better about themselves. Don’t let their happiness com at the price of yours. Don’t allow your self to get caught up in a cyber ego measuring contest. You could be the world’s coolest person and this competition will make both of you look like vain jerks.

Make This Your Primary Communication Method

Hang out with the people you care about. I understand that sometimes schedules just never seem to line up, but when you see each other in person it will mean all the more. People with social anxiety or other mental disorders are most likely to fall in this trap. It can be more than difficult to shed the protective blanket and shield of the Internet but if you don’t you will never grow in your disorders. You MUST get out and experience life on life’s terms on occasion.

Don’t Become Emotionally Dependent

For whatever your reason for using a social media site don’t let it become the sole provider of whatever you are using it for. If you are using Facebook to keep up with friends be sure and call them every so often. If you are using Instagram to showcase your outfits, go to a fashion show or to a park with friends.

Make sure you keep your mental and emotional portfolio diversified. Over specializing in this way, in these social platforms, will spell trouble in the end.

http://thespiritscience.net/2016/02/26/never-do-social-media/