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COLUMN: The greatest tragedy in life

───   16:22 Tue, 16 May 2017

COLUMN: The greatest tragedy in life | News Article
Fannie Zim

I always thought and convinced myself that the greatest tragedy in life is death... as there is no coming back from death; it's a one way street.


For decades, I wondered what could be worse than death and I never found the answer... until one morning when I woke up to these thought provoking words by Martin Luther King Jr when he said: "Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter". Then the reality hit me hard; the sad painful reality dawned on me as I began to think about the tragedy that most marriages/relationships/friendships/families have suffered all because people kept quite about things that mattered to them and slowly died painful deaths of waking up every single morning and going to sleep every single night holding a grudge instead of expressing their feelings and letting it out there. This inner death eventually leads to the death of the relationship. So many lives and relationships (be it social or business) could have been saved; had people chosen not to perish from this greatest tragedy of not communicating. Communication is the foundation of every single form of any union in life and the absence of it; whatever you're trying to build or have built, will EFFORTLESSLY crumble down.

I woke up last week to a trending hashtag that read #MenAreTrash... this had me in thoughts all day as I was thinking to myself: "Good Lord, how did we get to this point?"

"What wrong did we as men do to be called trash?!"

Then I was made aware that a young man decided to beat someone he claimed to love and burn them to death; while another man decided to rape and kill a one-month-old baby; least I forget a 29-year-old man who raped and killed a 92-year-old woman. Oh, I almost forgot that 8-months pregnant mother who had to run for her dear life at 2 o'clock in the morning carrying her six-month-old crying baby in her arms. She ran away from being kicked in the very stomach that's carrying life by her abusive lover... and it was at this moment that I was once again reminded that the greatest tragedy in life is not death... but a man dying inside of a boy; a man refusing to live by the Bible that he reads every day he wakes up, where it says in 1 Corinthians 13-11: "When I was a child, I spoke and thought and reasoned as a child. But when I grew up, I put away childish things."

The greatest tragedy of an abuser being born befalls women when a man refuses to put childish ways behind him and become the man that he is called to be. But more tragic are the actions of good men who sits back and do nothing. Men who will shake your hand; the very same hand you just laid on a woman and say: "You the man!" What kind of a man are you? A man who lays his hand on the very same person he's supposed to protect and care for, on the very same person whom he's supposed to use his hands for to provide food; shelter and clothes instead of using those very same hands to provide pain; hurt; misery and sadness? What kind of a man are you who bad mouths a woman all because she turned you down? Only trash can do that; not a REAL MAN who knows and understands his purpose and role in life. Least I forget the tragedy of a mother dying inside of a young pregnant girl who gave birth and decided to wrap that beautiful bundle of joy in a refuse bag and throw him alive into a pit toilet. I sit and wonder what that child could have amounted to had his life not been barbarically cut short.

The greatest tragedy in life is not death... but a life not lived well. When Nelson Mandela sadly left us; we celebrated his life more than we mourned it... and that's because he did not just live long but he lived well. Make something out of your life. Stand up for what's right and be counted or forever lie down and be walked on. You are purposefully made and put here on earth for a reason. You're not here just to fill numbers in class; at work; at church in the team or anywhere... But you're here to make a name for yourself; to uplift your communities; to help the less fortunate; to touch and change lives. So live well. When you sadly honor the only guaranteed invitation in life... that of death, let your loved ones find comfort in knowing that you lived well; in knowing that you made every day count and made it a point that you went to bed every night with a grateful happy heart... having done what you were called to do.

My heart broke in January when I saw hundreds of students who performed well, not being able to study further due to financial constraints...

I sank deep into misery when I heard a friend tell me of a life changing business idea that will never see the light of day all because she doesn't have the necessary capital to finance her idea... and once again my soul got troubled as the reality hit me once again that death is overrated... the greatest tragedy is a lawyer/doctor/pilot dying inside of a learner... and a prominent successful businesswoman/man dying inside of a young ambitious youth. Every single person in life has potential inside of them... each and every one of us is good at something and it remains our sole responsibility to discover exactly what that is. Stop being a lazy bum! Always telling and convincing yourself that you're not good at anything when in reality you are and all you have to do is find out exactly what it is that you're good at. The greatest tragedy in life flourishes when people fail to discover their potential and maximise it as this will mean the death of unsung songs; new life changing inventions and the death of great sportsmen and sportswomen due to undiscovered talent.

Men have to stand up and show their sons and daughters how a woman is supposed to be treated by how well they treat their mothers. Ladies, stand up against abuse! Once he lays his hand on you; walk away because from that moment onwards, he will never stop. Show your siblings and daughters what they deserve by not settling for an abusive relationship which has the potential of leading to your death. But stand up and say; I deserve better! Young people; the future of this country and the world at large rests solely in our hands; let's unite, empower and encourage each other and take our rightful places in the society.

There are goodness and greatness that exists inside each and every one of us. Don't let it die. Release it into the world. Don't deprive and starve the world of it; it's needed.

SAY NO TO THE GREATEST TRAGEDY IN LIFE!

Today being a CHOOSEDAY; I challenge you to make a CHOICE not to suffer from the greatest tragedy in life but rather to RISE and BECOME!

Happy CHOOSEDAY!

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