Hello hello hello…

Last night I went to a braai in true South African fashion.

This all took place at the home of people I have never met and as someone who is socially awkward at times this was quite nerve wrecking. Fortunately over the years I have gathered some useful techniques in my arsenal.

Hopefully these few tips will help you out if you are ever in the same boat.

1. When you greet the new people, make eye contact and smile. Don’t grin like a paedophile.

2. Small talk is good later on. Don’t talk about yourself too much unless you get asked. Rather ask the person out about their careers, upcoming projects or home town. Not the colour of their underpants. Don’t get into a debate on religion or politics. The odds that you will agree on everything are very slim.

3. Read the room. If you aren’t sure of whether or not your joke will be funny rather shut up. Unless you want to be slow-clapped out of the building.

4. It is important to be polite, but don’t be afraid of being yourself. Rather let people dislike the real you than love a fake you.

5. Do not pitch up at a braai bringing nothing. Sometimes people will say that they have everything sorted but judge you when you only walk in with you car keys and cellphone.

6. Since the people and surroundings are new, do not drink too much. This puts you in danger of making a fool of yourself and the person(s) you arrived with.

7. Last but not least, don’t take a doggy bag home! The left over food is still the host’s!